They have no idea...

I really wonder how my students would change in the classroom if they had any idea how much I thought about them while not in the classroom.

I can recall two instances of sharing with a struggling student that I had been thinking of them and seeing their whole countenance change instantly. Suddenly, they told me everything. Nothing was too personal. They trusted me immediately. Granted, we had spent some time together in the classroom, but to see how much that meant to them really shows me how much we all long to be important to someone.

Over the past many years, I've learned to share my life with the Lord. I wonder if I had the privilege of being married if instead I'd get to share my life with my husband, but since I've not been blessed with that yet, I share my life with the Savior and our Heavenly Father. Yes I pray and talk to them. But more than that I try and recall moments where we can share in the same emotions. I find this makes all the difficult times so much more bare able, and I also believe that it is the root of the atonement. Become one with Christ.

So with that in mind, I think of those moments when I know the Lord is thinking of me. Like my students, it's those small moments he takes the time to make me feel important that I'm grateful for. I pray that I may follow his example and continue to help make others around me feel important and thought of.

On the other hand, I tried to reach out to so many students. So many that had the look of hard and hopelessness ingrained into their countenance. (They're in high school!!) And how much I just wanted them to trust me. How much I wanted them just to allow me to care about them, even just a little bit. Some, just couldn't find the motivation, others fought my efforts, at full strength. What were they afraid off? Why would they not trust me, that what I was encouraging them to do was for their good?!

Oh the pain that the Savior and our Heavenly Father must feel. If I feel pain for a student choosing to be stubborn in a high school history class, I can only pretend to fathom the pain they feel for one of their children choosing to stay hard hearted. In those moments I mourn with them. In those moments I feel closer to them.

How much would I change in this life, if I knew how much our Lord and Father thought about me?